I knew I needed to reach out to a medium to try and connect with my brother to start the healing process. That night I went on Facebook and low and behold there was a live stream of a medium doing readings. I watched for a while and felt pulled to her. I spoke with Derek about it and he stated that if that is what I felt I needed to do then to go for it. I figured hey if I don’t get anything out of it then so be it, but if I do then wonderful! I emailed her and booked in for a telephone reading.
The call came the next night at 10:30pm. I was booked in for a half an hour. This phone call led until 12:30 am! My brother had so much to tell me. I was so thankful. We had the phone on speaker so Derek could listen in. Right away my brother came through and told the medium exactly what I had written in my letter. He answered my questions! Everything added up to the coroner’s report. She explained that he had a heart attack and was gone before he hit the floor. She told me he was proud of me. That he would go to a swing under a walnut tree (when we lived in Osoyoos B.C. we had had a walnut tree in our back yard and we had a make shift swing under it). He then asked her to ask me about the toaster and that he was laughing! Oh my gosh. Derek and my mouth dropped open. There is no way she could know this information! For the past weeks at this point I continually was giving everyone crap in the house for touching the toaster. Every time I would go to make toast in the morning, I would push down the handle and it would start toasting. A few moments later that toast would pop back up untoasted! Someone had turned my dial down to 0! Derek and the kids thought I was nuts haha as this was an everyday occurrence. Well John had now disclosed this was him playing tricks on me. He even stated that he was messing with my mom’s computer. It just so happened that my mom’s computer would continually shut off or the screen would go blank. Later on, after finding out this was John, she would tell him out loud to cut it out and it would stop. My brother loved playing jokes and getting your goat. Our son is the exact same way. If he can make you laugh and smile, he feels his job is done.
John told the medium that he was with us all and he was watching over our son. She taught me a cool trick. If when I was laying in bed and I needed to reach out to him I could slowly move my left hand out around me. If I felt a warm spot it was my brother and I could talk to him. Now the most amazing piece of information that there was no way she could know was, John said, “You have surgery tomorrow.” I stated yes this was true. He stated it was at 1:00pm. I said, “No its at 11:30am.” He responded that it was going to be moved to 1:00pm. He told the medium the surgery was in my lower abdomen. He also stated that the doctors did not know what they were talking about and to not listen to them. (During my previous cancer biopsy, the doctor told me that after this surgery I would no longer be able to carry a child (I had been told this in the beginning and they were wrong)). He told the medium everything would be okay and that he would be there with me for my surgery.
John also told the medium that my dad will find his jacket in his belongings at the house and to keep it. He also told my mom that he still had his gold chain and cross that she had given him. John as well told the medium he was with our grandma and grandpa. She saw him singing and banging away on a guitar (my brother was learning how to play). She saw him laughing, (he loved to laugh). He also stated he was with his dogs. Then the tears began. He said he was with our baby we lost……
The reading brought so much comfort to me. Just being able to reminisce with my brother and know that he was there and what she was saying was accurate filled my heart and I could begin to feel the physical and emotional healing begin.
The medium also honed in on Derek. She picked up on his grandpa. He stated that he spent his days on his boat fishing. (He loved doing this) She talked about the baby brother he had lost that was never born and some sensitive family issues I will not discuss out of respect. This medium was so dead on we booked her in for party at our house. We both went to bed that night feeling pretty grateful and blessed. I could feel Derek was relieved it went as well as it did as he missed the old me, although he never complained about my grieving process and continued to support me every step of the way. He loves me unconditionally and I him. When we said in our vows, “Until death do us part,” we meant it. We are both thankful for each other and our family.
We woke up early the next morning. I was still on a high from the previous night. I had to get on the phone and call my mom. We even booked her in for a phone call of her own for a future date. I was nervous though, another cancer surgery. More pain, Eight weeks at least of not lifting my babies and no driving. Thank God for my parents and Derek. They took shifts between the three of them to help me and the kids between work, fire calls and life. So, we get into the car and I have always had this thing about not being late. I always have to be early for everything. Maybe its because I hate waiting on others. I find it so disrespectful. Well guess what? We were running late! I am panicking and Derek was relaxed saying, “Hey Hun it’s fine! Your brother said the appointment would be moved to a later time. Don’t worry!”……Are you fricken kidding me?! I looked at him and said, “Just because a medium said the appointment would be moved does NOT mean it will be! “I could not believe he was so relaxed!!! I was panicked, pissed off and so nervous! We pulled up to the Cross Cancer Clinic and guess what….no parking…This day could not get any worse right now. After fifteen minutes or so we found a spot. I started running ahead yelling at Derek to hurry up…what does he do? He smiles and strolls along saying, “Don’t worry it will be fine, just relax.” Haha have you ever been an angry woman and someone tells you to relax…..hahaha. I was fuming. We get into the building. I grab my Cross identification card and wait forever in line to check in. I then run ahead telling Derek he can catch up. I find my location and get up to the desk to register. I apologize over and over for being late. The nurse turns to me and says, “oh no worries. Have you eaten? Because we are running behind and your appointment is moved to 1:00pm. You might as well go grab a muffin or something.”………..really.
Just then Derek strolled in with a smile on his face. I stared at him. Speechless. I then said, “Well my appointment has been moved to 1:00pm, so let’s go to the cafeteria.” (very monotone I was haha). Derek smiled and said, “Told you so, your brother told us. You just needed to listen.” We went and grabbed something small to eat and headed back to our location. When the time came for my procedure the panic and fear set in again. I hated this. They hurt so bad and there was never any feeling of dignity. They just cut and burn away while you lay there helpless watching on a screen. They put in the freezing and it only numbed a small area, so once again I felt the majority of it. I laid there screaming (poor Derek and the other patients could hear me in the waiting room). The doctor looked at me and said, “Okay deep breath, this is going to be a big one.” They placed stress balls in both my hands to squeeze. I felt the slice go deep. It was in that moment I remembered John saying he would be with me. I looked up to the ceiling. All of a sudden, my body began warming up from head to toe in waves of heat (I had been shivering with cold and fear). I felt a sudden calmness and I had stopped shaking. I took a deep breath and tears rolled from my eyes. I wasn’t crying but the tears were rolling. I knew it was my brother with me. Calming me. Comforting me in his own way. I then heard in my mind, “I got you. I’m here, don’t worry its almost done.” Just then the doctor said, “You are all finished.” They did what they needed to do and sat me upright. The doctor was going through my file chatting with me. She stopped and said, Wait a minute. You didn’t have that procedure I thought you had in the past! What was I talking about?! Your good girl! Go ahead and have more babies!” What……. That’s exactly the message my brother told the medium.
The doctor and nurse left the room. I hobbled into my clothes and slowly shuffled into the waiting room. Derek got up right away and grabbed my arm to help me out. As the door closed behind us, I started bawling. He held me close letting me cry. When I was finished, I told him what had happened, what I had felt and what the doctor had said. He was so happy John had been there with me as he was not allowed in during the procedure. WE made our way to the car in silence as I was soaking it all in. When we got into the car, I called my mom and cried telling her everything. It was a good cry. Just knowing what was told to me, things I wanted and needed to hear had come true. I was on my way to healing my heart, my mind and my cancer with support, and not just support in this physical realm.
Thank you, John. I know you are reading this before you leave on your new journey August 11th. Thank you for that day you were with me. Thank you for being my brother. Without having experienced everything with you that I had I would not be the person I am today or on this journey right now. I hope we get to cross paths in my next life. I miss you dearly and thank you for visiting us all. Thank you for watching over the kids. I wish you nothing but the best in your next life. Prosperity, health, love, happiness and a handful of your own children to love and care for with an amazing supportive wife. I will continue sending you Reiki. No matter where you are in your journey. You will know someone is loving and supporting you in your next life. It will be me my Brother. Forever and always so much love to you. You will never be forgotten. Love always your little sister. xoxox